A reflection on the Permission to Be.

Hi there. I decided to start integrating little reflections as part of this blog. Small pieces for big feelings.

I write these when the world feels loud and I need a place to listen. No fixes, no five-step plans, just honest moments from life. Read them in one breath. Let them sit with you. Then, if you like, read them again.

“Nature has no purpose. It simply exists.”

That line from Zach Bush’s podcast Breaking Free from Emotional Addiction hit me hard. He talks about how the human obsession with purpose, especially the constant search for it, is in a way, a narcissistic construct.

A social concept that feeds our addiction to doing. When we chase purpose, we often attach expectations to it. We start thinking we need to build something, contribute something, become something. But nature doesn’t think like that. It just is.

For so long I treated purpose like a job title for my soul. If I could just name it, chase it, deliver on it, I’d be worthy. Even cancer couldn’t fully quiet that reflex. During chemo I was forced to stop doing, but my mind kept searching for the next thing to build, the next version of me to become. I just had to do something right?

Friends tried to help. Maybe a new hobby? What about some volunteer work? I heard the love in it, and I also saw the program we all run: turn every pause into a plan, make the time useful. It showed me how trained we are to believe that value lives in activity.

What I needed was not a project. It was permission. The most honest thing during that time was to do less and heal. To let this forced pause teach me that being is not a gap to fill. It is ground I can stand on.

Some impressions from our new home: Melbourne! 🩵

Maybe there was never a purpose to lose. Maybe there was only noise to soften. Presence isn’t an achievement. It’s the ordinary miracle of being here at all. The world still turns without me proving anything to it.

Nature doesn’t try to earn its place. It doesn’t defend its worth or justify its rest. The moon doesn’t hurry through its phases. Bears sleep through winter and call it wisdom. They are. And that is enough.

So here’s my reminder for me, for you, for anyone no matter what:

"You do not need permission to be. Not from a plan. Not from productivity. Not even from your bravest version of yourself."

If the day is small, let it be small. If your body asks for a break, give it a break. Healing can look like stillness, like saying no, like feeling what you’ve postponed. Nothing about that makes you less. It makes you honest.

I’m not rushing to fill the silence anymore. I’m choosing to live inside it. To notice the morning light on the wall. To smell the flowers. To enjoy every single sip of my coffee. To trust that the point of my life is not out there in a project, it’s right here in a heartbeat.

Purpose can visit if it wants but I won’t chase it. In the meantime, I’m choosing the most basic thing and somehow the hardest: being.

If you catch yourself wanting to stay busy or feeling guilty for resting, here’s a small reminder: Morning light never hurries. Sit back in your chair. Unclench your jaw and let your shoulders drop. Birds rest between flights. Cancel one nonessential thing today..

You are worthy of just being. 💖

.. and if you’re curious: next time I’ll take a small neurological detour, into what the brain is doing when we do less and simply allow ourselves to be. See you there?

Inspired by Zac Busch’s podcast “Breaking Free from Emotional Addiction."